I will grant that producing an Oscars telecast is a thankless task, perhaps one that has crossed over fully into hopelessness. Even in a year such as this, when there was actually some doubt about the inevitability of certain major awards–it would have been upsets but not shocks had Best Picture, Best Director and both categories for actresses gone different ways–there’s such a profound lack of tension and surprise to the actual awards part of Academy Awards night that I don’t know can be done to enliven the show. Unfortunately, Craig Zadan and Neil Meron don’t know either.

Returning after last year’s sleazy, nasty debacle, Zadan and Meron did exactly what Academy producers have been doing for years now: overcorrecting for the prior year’s errors. James Franco and Anne Hathaway comes across as unskilled and anxious? Then bring in venerable Billy Crystal to steady the ship. Seth MacFarlane is unctuous, sexist, and juvenile? Bring in someone guaranteed not to offend. I think Ellen DeGeneres is a dandy choice on paper, and her very best moment of the night was truly inspired. But overall she seemed a little off her game, stumbling over lines and names. She should have scrapped the joke about mispronouncing Goldie Hawn’s name (which was done better earlier in the awards season anyway) after actually slipping up on Christoph Waltz. Of course, anyone else’s name mispronunciations were given a free pass by the gracious ineptitude of Mr. John Travolta.

My favorite cineaste said she though DeGeneres delivered a “lazy” show. Initially, I disagreed, but I’m coming around to that line of thinking. For example, the pizza gag was cute enough, but spreading it out across three different segments made it feel like they were sloppily spackling over an idea gap. She was game, cheery, and pleasant (and, it is worth repeating over and over, worlds better than last year’s hot), but there wasn’t enough show there for her to work with. Or maybe simply not enough show that was worthwhile. For a ceremony that struggles with runaway length, there was an overabundance of padding last night, led by a trio of blandly-assembled clip packages of increasing pointlessness (animated films, everyday heroes, and the weirdly redundant “super” heroes). In all, the structure of the show was often baffling to me. On one hand, I understand the desire to save “Let It Go” until late in the night as an anticipated showstopper, but that meant pushing it until way past the bedtimes of the very kids who’ve been instrumental in making the song a sensation.

Then there is the issue of the awards themselves, which are in such lockstep with all the supposed precursors (more like excited predictors) that even the Independent Spirit Awards handed out trophies to all the exact same actors. Among the major awards there’s not a single winner who I would deem unworthy, but it still drains some of the energy out of the whole affair when, say, Cate Blanchett is making an elated, supposedly surprised speech for the umpteenth time. For every Lupita Nyong’o, who steps up with a masterfully movie and inspiring acceptance, there’s going to be a Matthew McConaughey, who’s gotten so accustomed to talking about himself that he seems unaware that there’s any other subject that might be worthy of attention at that moment. Apart from the Academy entirely upending the system and moving their awards to an early enough date to combat groupthink, it’s hard to envision this changing.

Then again, I don’t necessarily think the situation needs to change. The secret to adding greater import to the Academy Awards is right there in the way recipients look at the award. Oscar is different. It means more. No one is ever going to ask Jared Leto where he keeps his Golden Globe, but he’s sure to be quizzed about where the golden man resides in his house. It would be nice to find some Oscar show producers who know how to tap into that, or show any evidence whatsoever of even understanding it. For every last winner last night–in some ways, especially those who won in the so-called technical awards–the honor changed everything about their careers. One of these years I’m hoping to finally see another version of the Academy Awards show that carries the weight and excitement of that level of import. Until then, I know the awards will be enjoyable, even a little irresistible to me. But they won’t be as good as they could be or, maybe more disappointingly, as they once were. They’re cold pizza.